Tuesday, October 17, 2006

DO NOT HIT SEND!


This is the warning my friend Linda bellows into my ear. My Boss echoes it. Peggy preaches it. Spontaneous words. I am compelled to let them fly. A fleeting thought becomes a giant break-through in spiritual self awareness , and suddenly it all makes sense and I have to share it.... SEND! DONE! SHARED! Of course, the morning after, I might not feel the same....

"Mom! Tell me you DID NOT just break up with him on text message?"
"Ummm. yeah"
"Arrrrrrggggghhhhh. Do you think you're 18 again?"
"Ummmm. yeah.... kinda"

I do that. Dirty little fingers. Draw it . Write it . Type it . And hit send! I've written 3:00 in the morning love letters to strangers (well, almost strangers .... Kimbies surgeon for example) and walked them to the leaning mailbox, placed the flag at high mass, at 3:45 AM. In the morning when I wake up, trudge down the gravel drive way, back up and see the little red flag waving at me, I cringe a little.... "Oh God, I have to take it out...snatch the words from the runway before the postman finds them and sets them free" and then I turn the music up louder and keep backing out. Put it in forward. And drive off. It's a love letter for crying out loud. If he thinks I'm a nut so be it. He saved my sisters life. I can write him love letters if I want.

I've painted billboard revalations..... giant banners of "Do you get my drift yet?" and left them annonymously staked on obvious corners like "We Buy Houses" Signs or " Speeding fines doubled when workers present" signs. (Skinny, I remember the night we hauled off with the Beach Bag sign.... Paul McCartney on the radio... "Baby you amaze me"..... We laughed all the way home, high from the "WE DID IT" "WE GOT THE LAST WORD IN!")

I hit send.

If I have something to say at the moment. And it feels right. I hit the button. I might have better manners, or be more reserved, or more inclined to keep it to myself in the morning, but if it feels right when you think it, share it.

Last night my internet was down.
This morning it was down.

I wanted to hit SEND so bad I couldn't stand it.

For once in my life,
I'm glad I couldn't.

Must be that "Baby, you amaze me" thing.

10 comments:

skinnylittleblonde said...

Babe, You amaze me...

JustRun said...

I don't think I'll ever completely
understand that whole "discretion is the better part of valor" thing.

vicci said...

Sas....Please get a hold of me...my e-mail is vican100@hotmail.com
I need to ask you a question...but...it's a surprise!

shola said...

Oh no! I just was on the other side of that -- and convinced my friend that breaking up over text message is NOT okay. He didn't hit send.

singleton said...

SLB...and you ALWAYS amaze me!

Glorybe...you send love letters too, you just don't know it!

Just Run.... I sooooo agree!

Sweet Vicci.... I hit send!

Photo Blog Girl.... Can you be my friend? Cause mine couldn't talk me out of it! LOL! It's all good. They were never the final words, but perhaps, in looking back, the beginning of the end....which of course opens the door to a whole new beginning!

Deepak Gopi said...

Hi :)
Thanks for the Wishes.
Happy diwali.

Me said...

You're an absolute classic. I love reading your writing since it leaves me feeling a little high. While it makes sense its just confusing enough to leave me smiling.

Anonymous said...

Persichetti says...

Not mention all of those secret valentine...oh what fun!

skinnylittleblonde said...

Hurry! Hit Send! Don't let that moment escape you!
;)

singleton said...

The Great...
Great wishes!

Orhan....they do say a little high will leave you smiling! Thanks!

Persichetti, you little bugger, I almost pulled those "secrets" out and gave them a little audience....
You're, as usual, egging me on! I love you, girlfriend!

SLB...
always! (Except....they've already shut off the phone and this little ethereal connection is soon to be lost in the "to be paid" stack...so please KNOW, if I hide for a while, it's not because the moment has passed, just the due date! Love you!