Saturday, May 05, 2007

Slammed....

It’s just a crooked screen door. Kind of Florida-like, kind of Victorian, kind of 50ish. One of those. It’s the rusty hinges that do me. The cheap haunted house sound they make. The way they pro-create their own tainted WD40, oozing like dirty glue, dripping down the door frame.

The hinges. My doorbell. My pit bull. The way I know if my next door neighbor, Maggie, is ready for coffee…sneaking over in her pajamas on Saturday morning ,hangover plastered on her face….if my Father has lumbered up the drive-way , "The beer-garden-fairy", on Friday afternoon, to have his “dearest darling daughter” chat, if my son has successfully stumbled past the benches and made it as far as the screened porch to make bodily noises and expel his Friday night at my feet. But, made it home Alive.

It’s the way I know if the mailman, who has had a crush on me since 1999, has left a package from SLB, loitering if he thinks I’m at home. The way I know if Daniel got my cut-off notices in his mailbox again, and is slipping them discretely onto the outdoor coffee table.

It’s the announcement.

Anyone that rings the real doorbell, stands on the front porch, and leans past the wasp nests, through the bouganvilla,to put their dirty little fingers on the front door button, is a stranger. God, I hate that sound. The ringy ding screams trouble. On the other side of that noise stand cops, Religious witnesses, pizza deliveries to the wrong address, men in uniforms selling fertilizer, frozen steaks, and serving subpoenas. I have furniture piled up in front of that door. Even in a fire, we’d have to run out the kitchen door, couldn’t be saved by the sound of the saving grace. We don’t do the front door. It’s the screen door that spells welcome. The screen door that is dressed in an old piece of oak, carved by Skinny , that says “This house believes…”, the screen door that I slam when I’m having a hissy fit, that I flit in and out of, creaking, squeaking, slamming…..

God, I love the noise we make

When we’re not strangers……

26 comments:

skinnylittleblonde said...

Hahahaha....Yet Another Post I Simply Love!
Your side door definitely says 'Welcome'(even without the word 'welcome') and anyone that would even attempt that front door has got to be a stranger. Stranger still ... they either have no balls or no perception. I say that because your side door is that inviting and your front door is all but covered from the outside looking in.
ILYSVM

No said...

Welcome to my world, girl...we should form a club,huh?

Scott from Oregon said...

Mt sister's doors make a beep beep when passed through. Damn alarm protecting a single lady...

Hates It!


My grandmother in Jackson, Mississippi had the best screen door ever. It led to a screened-in porch with a swing that creaked when you swang...

singleton said...

skinny...."Stranger still ... they either have no balls or no perception"....LOL! That or they afraid to walk under the trinket covered arbor to get here!

No....I'm in, I'll bring the keep-out sign and the beer!

Scott... Oh no! Not the beeps! And oh, Mamaws's swing, you just brought a rush of memories right threw my rickety screen!

Bardouble29 said...

Growing up we used the back door and not the front. My mom would always yell at me when I slammed the screen door. You bring back so many memories.

Angela Marie said...

I love those kind of doors! I remember trying to sneak in those doors... never got away with it. I remember having something planned and spraying WD Fourty on the hinges! LOL! That was a dead give away! My mom knew there was something up!

Gotta love those doors!

SpongyBones said...

Man you and your sister tell some cool stories! Brings back my own childhood and slamming doors at the neighbors house!

singleton said...

Bardouble...laughing...we always used the other doors, too....Only half the time we didn't even shut them.....So of course we got to spend a great deal of time running around the house with flyswatters...

Angela Marie....Funny, how Mom's always know! but they choose their battles well....deciding when to bust us and when to let us learn on our own!

Spongy....Sometimes a good slam is all it takes! Isn't it funny that they make doors now to swoosh closed.....to glide....They really take all the fun out of coming and going!

Gill said...

I associate those doors with tumbleweeds and Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz. Those doors hold many tales. Also the Color Purple. Slamming shut. Holding in secrets and lies.
Wonderful writings you!

Shrink Wrapped Scream said...

"Beer garden fairy" !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh, I love you girl.. I can relate to that one. Your words DANCE off the page, graceful,unsentimentally razor sharp, and warm beyond belief. I always leave from you smiling..x

singleton said...

Blue....Yeah, theres no place like home.....And here, the color purple is everywhere, mixed in with every other....color! No lies I hope, but the secret lives we lead are most at home, at home.

shrink wrapped....Yeah, baby, that would be Dad-O, come to visit, toting his gifts on Friday afternoons...."an iced cold twelve pack for your week-end"!
Smile on new friend.

Enemy of the Republic said...

Just linked ya.

mindy said...

i wish i were next door. i'd love to pop in for coffee...and i'd never use the front door! :)

singleton said...

enemy....back at you, girl! May the circle be unbroken....

mindy....cream and sugar?

JustRun said...

Ahh, the side door. Some people just don't get it. It's useful, though, like you said, for weeding out those that don't belong. Or don't yet belong, anyway.

And you have a pit bull? (Or did I misread?) I wouldn't have guessed. But some of the sweetest dogs I've met have been pitties.

mindy said...

how did you know? :)

SHE said...

oh! the scenes you paint in my mind...

favorite short animation films ")

love the front door/welcome door contrast

i've often considered painting a sign that reads: have you been personally invited? yes/come in. no/better start runnin'

Rachelle said...

I says Cool Beans!
Love your site- followed Shrink here.
It is just a great day when I find new writers to read.
Do you do all the artwork yourself?
Beautiful...
Slainte~
Rachelle

singleton said...

Just run....My sweetheart pit passed away many moons ago....Her name? MoonPie! Nah, i don't have one now....it's the hinges that make that noise! The lovergirl I have now is a good ole Georgia mutt I hauled home from the middle of nowhere, and....by the way, she only barks at the front door!

Mindy.... :)

She...I love it! "Better start runnin'"! Yeah, we think alike!

rachelle....Shrink is something else, huh? Her words move me, totally. Thanks. The artwork is mine but usually lives at justgivemepeace , I just drag 'em over to visit on these pages every now and then! BTW, i'm coming to visit. Front door or side?

Me said...

You make being you so wonderfully welcoming. Never a stranger, you and I. Much <3!

Me said...

P.S. Beautiful artwork :)

singleton said...

Orhan...I hear ya knockin'! peace,love, and smiles!

Rachelle said...

Singleton,
Side door, of course!
Works out so great, our 'front door' is actually at the back of our house on approach. So we know it's strangers when the front door knocks.
Some ginger iced tea?
See you soon,
Rachelle

singleton said...

rachelle.....
with lemon, please....:)

singleton said...

tai....Thank you....so you know about the windchimes, don't you?

singleton said...

tai...I hope the wind rattles their chains a little more today...and they lullabye me back....